so i've been corresponding with this kid (we'll call him baghdad because he's in the army and that's where he's stationed) for about a month or so. he texted me randomly after friend-requesting me on facebook because we have a mutual friend and he saw my picture. he's been texting me since, sending me pics, videos, etc some of which i have generously shared with my closest girl buds. lol so anyway, in addition to professing his undying love for me, calling me his princess and swearing that i'm his dream come true (hahaha!!), he now insists that i'm the girl of his dreams, his soulmate, and he wants to come back from Iraq and MARRY ME!!
I have a couple of issues with this...
1) i have never met this person. He was deployed two weeks after he started texting me. during those two weeks he begged me incessantly to come to fort drum and bang him silly before he left. he said he'd pay me for gas, tolls, put me up in a hotel, buy me dinner, drinks, gifts... whatever i want. i didn't go. obviously.
2) he has stated a couple of times that he gets like double the pay if he's married than he does as a single soldier. why this is, i don't know. but it sounds fishy to me. i'm nobody's meal ticket.
3) he keeps saying he's going to give me my fairy tale happy ending and all that corny disney hallmark bs. like he's going to save me, take care of me forever... i'm not the kind of girl that likes a knight in shining armor. i can take care of myself damnit. i don't need need his ass taking care of me. he ignores this fact.
4) he keeps telling me he doesn't want me to see other guys. HELLO?!?! your ass is across the world from me! you don't own me! you won't even be in the same time zone until March 2010. what am i supposed to do? sit around drummin my fingers waiting for some guy i've never even met, who's kind of a nasty freak sending me videos of him slapping his own cock, who wants to marry me for his own financial gain, etc etc etc
5) i can't help but point out that the man i was with for almost 10 years of my damn life adamently REFUSED to marry me under any circumstances. this character has known me 2 minutes and never met me but wants to?? not right
6) he's short
ok that's all. i expect your input on this.
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yeah bad idea. He's a moron!
ReplyDelete1. Ridonkulous! Big assumption that you're gonna give it up b/c he's going away, bitch I don't know you!
2. That actually is true about increased pay & better benefits all around- the idea is that if he's away fighting it's taking away from the income he could be providing at home. Still for all you know he's scamming you to get the $ for himself.
3. Exactly right, this is 2009 since when other than the cheezball romantic comedies do fairytale endings happen. And some happy ending, yay we're married & oh wait you're in the army until when...??
4. Back the truck up...slow it down with the demands bank robber we're not even together, you don't even know my middle name hoe!
5. part 1 - douche. part 2- scam.
6. Don't want no short, short man!