If the PERV fits.....

About a week or two ago I was at work wearing one of my favorite pairs of Guess pumps that I bought on super-duper-clearance at Macy's. Being that they were such a great deal I bought the only size they had left which was a 9 1/2. I wear an 8 1/2 and the occasional 9. So these were huge on me. I loved them so I tried to make them work. Lord Baby Jesus knows I tried. But after almost killing myself 3x by walking out of them at work, I decided I had to let them go.
They were leather Guess shoes - worth some $$$. Not gonna just drop those off at the Salvation Army, I was hoping to get a little cash for them so I put them up on Ebay. Now to be fair, they were not disgusting and in fact were hardly worn because they were too big. People buy worn clothing items all the time on Ebay so why not, eh? Well.... the response was staggering. I had something like 32 "watchers" on them, the page with a modest picture was viewed by 300+ members, and the selling price??? After a fierce bidding war between a few "gentlemen" they went for $86!!!!! PLUS SHIPPING!!!! I think I smell a new business venture, pun intended. Below are some of the messages I received:


"Are they good and smelly and hurtin' for a squirtin?"

"Are these smelly?"

"Hi - how high are the heels? Very sexy pumps! Do you sell your shoes often?Thanks,LovesPumps"

"Are they nice and smelly?"

"Would you consider including a picture of you wearing them. Clothed of course, i just would like to see who was wearing them before i received them. Also cleaning would not be necessary as they would be going to the local cobbler for cleanup and repair."

"HOTT HOTT HOTT... OMG, they are so huge on your tiny feet! When you walk in them does your feet leave the shoe with each step and you flash us with your sole???"

"Wonderful! Thank YOU miss! I can then assume that they are fragrant? The mixed aroma of nylon, leather and grrrl goes straight to my *head*AL"

"Oh my goodness, Your arches are magnificent~! are they leather? Are there toeprints? Can you ship ups or fedex?AL"

"Hi there, Sorry for how weird this email will seem, I was curious, if you have ever heard of a crush fetish, where guys get turned on by seeing women step on and crush live things like insects, frogs , mice etc, especially in high heels, and was wondering also, if you ever crushed anything under these sexy shoes while you were wearing them, would you consider wearing them, crushing some bugs and taking pictures for the winning bidder? Ed "

"dear leeloo,would you say that they carry any kind of scent?"

"Yy=our arches are magnificent miss! your toes like sukkable shrrmps..do you sell hose or closed toe stilletoes?AL"

"I prefer freshley worn shoes no cleaning!!..If you can..send them in a zip-loc bag so they can be fresh and well worn.. thanks!!"

"Wow, compliments on the pic!!"

"Hey sweetie, do you have a pic of what is held inside this item? ;-) "

"I like items that are trashed. Pretty much ANYTHING that have come into contact with your hot feet! The more well worn and trashed the better. A ME page with pictures of you would be great! I like to pay top dollar for the most trashed hot items.....look forward to more of your auctions. If you have something that jumps out at me I'll see if you'll do a buy it now."

"Hi. I LOVE your feet. I would kill to suck on your toes. Do you have any trashed, single-band, leather, platform sandals or house slippers that you want to sell? I am looking for a sandal style similar to Steve Madden Pepe. If you go to Ebay Advanced Search and type in Steve Madden Pepe, you will see the style that I desire. Please let me know. If one of your girlfriends has this sandal style and would be interested in selling them, please let me know. Take care. "

" I do love these heels--especially the way you are modeling them-- such sexy foot gestures--you are a goddess! I want the shoes--and to buy more pictures of you modeling them digital photos, high quality -- for my own personal enjoyment. Willing to buy pictures, please write if interested: phot@yao.com"

"If I sent you a pair of black skechers bikers(womens size 7) that you could rip, tear or cut them enough to get your feet into them and take a few pics of how small they are compared to your beautiful feet? Either your toes hanging out the front or your heel splitting the backs apart!! Why you ask? They are an ex's and I'd love to send her picks of them torn apart on a beautiful Womans feet. Just let me know!! Thank You"

"G'DAY Again From DOWN underGee's thanks i will n ow put some bids in hope the bloody hell i win thanks again from down under.G'day (by the way we do talk like this everyday)Love ya.Malcolm."